Tweets

    lucillesballs:

    overhearing people talking about something u like

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    hearing that they talkin shit

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    (Source: comfy-pillows)

    I’ve discovered there’s a lot you can do inside haunted houses.

    fictionalfeather:

    For example, you can:

    • be in a shampoo commercial

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    • start a boy band:

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    • spot some choice booty:

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    • break into song:

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    • see some people in frankly offensive outfits:

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    • attend a metal show:

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    • listen to some sick jams:

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    • discover zombieism:

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    • sample some tasty snacks:

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    • watch someone get burned bad:

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    • find something you really like:

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    • find something you really, really like:

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    • find something you REALLY REALLY LIKE:

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    • and wonder if you left the stove on:

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    imsoshive:

    me: what’s for dinner?

    her: *spreads her legs*

    me: 

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    so, did you not cook or ….. cause chipotle closes at 10 and i need to leave now if i’m gon make it. 


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